In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.
This definitely was not mine before having a baby, back then it was: Physical Touch. Brief description below...
This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.
It's funny how having a baby changes things... Even in our marriage... My needs are so different now. Having time with my husband is more important than it's ever been to me for so many reasons. One of them is the simple fact that he is usually the only adult I get to interact with. Sadly, I need so much more from him now... I need support, sympathy, understanding, conversation, love, encouragement, openness... I have always needed these things from him, however, before I was getting these things from others at work or in school, etc. He is now my sole support system most of the time.
I am glad we are going through this study, it has opened up the dialog between Juan & I to understand each other better and be able to meet each other's needs and keep our love tanks on "full". What a blessing... Now to learn more about Juan's love language, which is: Words of Affirmation. Brief description below:
Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.
I highly recommend this book to any and all married folks...
May God bless you today.
Love these books. I have the ones for teens and for God. I also found his "The Five Languages of Apology" to be very helpful, too.
ReplyDeleteI am a Quality Time girl myself, but Words of Encouragement is a close second. I do find, however, that as I get older (and hopefully more mature) that I am much more multi-lingual and "conversant" in all the languages ... so it is hard, how, to think of a primary one.
Good for you!